CHANGE is never fun and CHANGE is not automatic.

Good morning girls......I just enjoy waking up and reading what God is doing in everyones lives. Today I woke up in awe of what I THINK he is trying to tell me.

Ya see, all weekend I have been in a self pity mode. Well yesterday, all day, I was like "where are you at God?" Yes I have been blessed beyond measure with this house but it seems we go from one trial to another. I have prayed about this thing, pray about this thing and prayed about this thing and still NO ANSWER. Can you see now why it's like, God, where are you at?

I came across this preacher on TV yesterday and he was preaching on stewardship and how God can sometimes test us even when it comes to MONEY. God has been dealing with me about this for a long time so I sat and listen and took it all in. I don't ever shop out of control, we don't have TOYS so to speak, our kids don't get everything handed to them but we have always had a financial problem so to speak in our household. It just goes out as fast as it comes in and God forbid something unexpected happens....it just throws it all out of whack.

Well anyway......we went to a revival last night at a chuch here in our little hometown of Calhoun Falls. Boy did GOD speak to me but not the way I expected. Isn't it always the way you least expect it? To begin with, his sermon title was CHANGE IS NEVER FUN, CHANGE IS NOT AUTOMATIC. I thought oh Jesus.....here we go, bring it on....this is somehing you know I need to hear. He went on with a illustration of bringing baggage into the church with you, laying it down long enough to go through the motions and picking it up and taking it back out the door with you. One of his illustrations was on BITTERNESS......having bitterness toward people. Don't get me wrong.....I am not bitter with anyway at this time in my life, I feel like I have all that under the blood but it was like GOD was standing right in front of me saying...."You have no bitterness with man but with me?" It hit me like a rock yall.....I had been bitter with God all day because he wasn't answering as quick as I thought he should. I continued to listen with a convicted heart and the evangelist said at some point in the sermon....."Do you ever think God could be testing you?, God could be trying to move you to a higher level in him and if you can't handle the trials you are facing now then how will you be able to handle others things at a higher level?" Can you all imagine now how I was feeling by this point?

Well, to make a long story short... I think God is trying to move me to a higher level in him....the evangelist was right on the money when he said...change is never fun and change is not automatic. Please pray for me, I want to be in God's will more than anything. I want to be used for his glory. I don't know if I have ever mention it on here but my husband feels a calling to be a preacher......he has preached numerous times in the past but was hurt very badly by someone he considered a friend, a mentor and did I mention was a preacher himself. Now my husband is running from that calling...I know he is.....he is still in church.....still loves the lord with all his heart...great person but running like crazy. PRAY for him too. Pray for our whole family....when you are not doing what God has called you to do .......you will be MISERABLE.

Thanks Leigh.....as I was reading you post this morning you had mention God has a better plan for me. he guides our footsteps . I firmly believe God guides my footsteps but moving me to a higher level in him is kinda scary. I think I will past this test he has put at my feet, I will not give up or give in.

Trying to stay in God's will,
Lisa