Well......good morning my blogger friends. It has been awhile since I have posted. I have read the blogs everyday, sometimes 2 or 3 times a day but just couldn't bring myself to post. It seems like God has had his hand over my mouth for a couple of weeks now. Ya know.....when God tells you to hush, you better listen to him....lol.
Well, well, well.....I just don't know where to start. As I look back on my previous post, I came across "change is never fun and change is not automatic" and I just chuckled in my spirit. So anyway here it goes.
About 2 years ago, my husband and I went through something (well actually my husband but it affected me just as well) and it totally turn our lives up side down and he was out of the will of God. We knew, he knew, everyone that knew what we were going through, knew this was totally out of character for him. Well to make a long story short......God begin to work it all out and we could see his hand in it all the way. Well as we were fighting a battle in our personal life, our church life started to crumble....it seems the more we tried to serve in the church, the worst things got. Well when it comes to my children.......I am very sensitive. Aren't we all ???? To try to shorten this a little.....we went to our pastor at that time and it just seemed to us the more we said about the situation with the youth, the worst things got. To make a long story short....we left the church because I felt like our children deserved more spiritually. They were not getting what they needed. Within one months time we started going to the church we are presently attending now. 14 months has past, we have grown stronger in the lord, our children are happy, we are on the greeters committe and I have my little missionette girls to whom I love so much. Well about 3 weeks ago (when this revival started here in CF which is going into it's 4th week by the way), about the 2nd or 3rd night into it I came home all confused (SATAN) and just couldn't pray, distrought and drowning in self-pity. Well the next morning, all though I felt like my prayers were not even reaching the ceiling must less the throne room of God, I begin to pour my heart to God and I told him just this......."God I don't understand what this is I am going through but I know you know what you are doing. Are we NOT in your will or what's the deal ???? Why am I feeling like this? I want to be in your will, I want my family to be in your will and most of all I want Mike to serve you whole heartedly. Tell me God what it is that we are supposing to be doing or not doing or what. God I can't go on like this....tell us, knock us in the head, do something, I don't like feeling like this. I am putting my whole life into your hands....tells us what it is you want us to do. I want us to be in your will....it's all up to you now." And that is how I prayed.......short and to the point.....girls, I was MISERABLE.
I think I fail to mention that this revival is being held at the church that we left 15 months ago......so now you probably see where I am headed with this post........ah hah !!!!! The night all this happened, a lady came up to us and told us (in love) that she felt like God was telling her to tell us that we belong back there. I have got to admit......in my heart I was like uh, uh, uh I don't think so but we took it in love. I asked Mike when we got in the car, what do you think, he said I don't know, I do miss that church and I love the people but I feel like COC is where we are supposed to be. (Let me mention, he was failing to tell me something at this point in fear of the way I would react) So anyway for the next 3 weeks God blesses us with his word in this revival and we are just strolling along taking it all in.......little did I know God was revealing stuff to Mike. I should have known God was up to something......when he shut my mouth and didn't allow me to nag Mike about anything.....lol
On monday night.........his sermon was on 'Why settle for Leah when you can have Rachel?" I am not going to sit here and act like I know this story in the bible because I don't, but what I gathered out of this was God was telling us" Why settle for less when I have more for you?" I am trying my best to make this short but i want you to know the whole thing because we need some powerful prayer warriors with us on this journey. So annnnyyyyyway........during the alter call Mike and I go down to be prayed for and God through the evangelist tells us this........"you have gotten mad in the past and picked up your kick ball and went home." Does this just not give you cold chills? He (evangelist) went on to to tell Mike that he (Mike) knows in his heart what it is supposed to be doing and he needs to take a stand as the spiritual head of the house. I am crying my eyes out at this point because I felt like I knew where this was going. On our way home........Mike reveals to me that about 4 different people over the last 4 or 5 weeks has approached him and told him that they felt like God was using them to tell him that he and his family belong back at that church. One of these people was the pastor........he told him that before we packed our bags and left, he was planning on making Mike the youth pastor of that church. he said he was stuck between a rock and hard place with the former person that was in the position of a youth worker (not a pastor). She is no longer even at the church because everything we were telling him came to surface and he seen it with his own 2 eyes. We feel like God moved us out of the situation, moved us to where we could grow stronger in him, feed our children the word, to move her out in his timing. So where does that put us ?????? You got it......the pastor wants Mike to take over the youth.....from ground up......their youth group is completely depleted. He said he would make him youth pastor and the sky was the limit as to what he felt like God could use him to do. He told us that we needed to do what we felt like our hearts were telling us to do but that he had trust and confidence in him to give him the rope and et him run with it. Did I mention in my prayer (that I didn't think that was reaching past the ceiling) that we wanted to be in his will ? LOL Yall, this is so hard because we have grown to love the people at COC, we are happy, our children are happy, everything is great in our eyes of the churchworld. My question and purpose of this whole post is why would God moved us from where we are so happy and our children are happy? My 15 year old said that that the evangelist prayed for him and told him that that mom and dad are fixing to go through a change and that he wanted him to just try to go with the flow......see how God is working? My 15 yr.old fell in head first @ COC and loves it. He tolds us he didn't want to leave his youth group but he would do whatever we decided to do.
Girls....PLEASE don't take this lightly......help me pray that whatever Mike chooses to do that I will submit to him and what he thinks is right for our family. I am trying my best not to offer any negative comments to him. I don't want to leave but I want to be in the will of God.......Please post your comments..........this is so hard.
Wanting to be in his will,
Lisa
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3 comments:
Goodness gracious girlfriend!
Well, it seems that God has clearly used His body to speak direction to you. I know that He must reveal it to you and Mike through His Word itself too. Never let the words of man be substituted for His very own (not to imply you would even do such). But just keep asking Christ Himself to speak to your heart over it. I know He will in His perfect timing.
May He make us walk in the paths of His commands.
Looks like God is connecting the pieces of this puzzle together...Isn't His timing awesome when He choosed to reveal things to you. I thought we could never survive when we left our first church, only for the second to be better, and then the third and now I LOVE where God is having us serve...He will bless you! Get in HIS word.
Thanks to you both.....I know that i know that i know God is calling us back.....I just want to be in his will. God is doing a work in me through all of this....changing the roles in our house....my husband has got to step up and be the spiritual head. I was told last night to just sit back, let God do his work and enjoy the ride. God called Mike but he called me to be a help mate....man oh man this whole thing is so powerful in our life....just keep praying.
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